home is a verb
By Christiana Jasutan
push
I
rusty
like
a torch
of my
tulang⁴
despite all
sayang⁶
pace
don’t
rumah²
love
at the
tongue
scrapimg
save
pulang¹
feel
rindu³
lit
back
twisting
tajam⁵
me
Footnotes:
¹My grandparents ran from their countries. When home stops becoming a place, it turns into a journey.
²Four walls, a roof, a floor, and everything still smells like soil.
³I am homesick for a place that has never claimed me. A place that didn’t birth my rib.
⁴Perhaps language creeps from another country, swims through the sea, before finally
finding ground in the hollowness of my bones.
⁵Perhaps I have swallowed it and now it burns my throat.
⁶Nevertheless, my love is an action, not possession.
¹Indonesian – go home (verb)
²Indonesian – home (noun)
³Indonesian – missing someone (noun, verb)
⁴Indonesian – bone (noun)
⁵Indonesian – sharp (adjective)
⁶Indonesian – dear, love (noun), loving someone sincerely without expecting anything in return (verb)
