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Greek Chorus Hears Medusa Doing Zumba

By Rayji de Guia

Did you hear mga dear Medusa

attends Zumba na? Left Mixxedfit

a misfit, tits slipping through the fit of her slip.

E ‘di wow, easier daw

kasi she’s well-endowed

with the highbrow knowhow –

Olga, that hija goes to yoga

without a toga. Gaga,

amiga, she doesn’t have a bra.     

I mean, is it desente to be

that kampante?

I hear she sneaks –

She a snake?

Putek, let me speak: she sneaks

snakes – snacks – ah, puta, I forgot e…

Mga bes, did you hear Medusa

has snakes on her neck

and under her chin?

Dae, Mareng Kiray says she cries when she tries

to raise her thighs every Muay Thai, aray.

Ay sus, I’m sure Perseus

would have issues –

Oh, Perseus! He’s got that

tight fit. Coach Perseus,

so courteous, pero medyo bastos.

His abs, her flabs,

not bagay, it’s sad.


I know it’s crass to make chismis

in class, it’s just–when you look into the glass:

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