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By Ed Garvey-Long

a Polari primer


I am vexed! Mincing down the tober, raging

like a nun in a dhobi machine. I caught ‘im

ogling an orderly daughter – betrayal

bold as a clashing roba!


I loved ‘im for yonks and never strayed.

Says he met that trade hoofing away in Heaven.

Says he didn’t know – but I could tell: lillylaw!

Muscles all over like slugs after rain.


What of the bijou flowery we’ve shared?

He doesn’t care – too naff now!

New trade’s got the dinari, treat him like a wife:

bona togs, bona grub, bona holibobs.


Yeah, sis, I’m out tonight. Need to screech

and scarper. Ogle some omi of me own.        

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